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THE SYSTEM IS RIGGED: Popular Vote Somehow Names Greninja, Not Pikachu, Japan's Favorite Pokémon

Here in the United States, today is the California primary, which should finally tell us who will be the Democratic nominee for president. But Japan doesn’t have any primary elections going on right now (to the best of my knowledge, and I don’t even know what I’d Google to check), so they’ve had to settle for a different kind of election — who is the most popular Pokémon? No joke, Japan is literally having a general election to figure out that pressing matter. But just because it’s an election about fictional video game monsters doesn’t mean its without stakes — the winning Pokémon will be distributed to fans who see the upcoming Pokémon the Movie: Volcanion and the Exquisite Magearna.

But why go through the formality? This is a slam dunk; obviously the most popular Pokémon is Pikach–

pikachu vote greninja
(source)

Greninja? Greninja? The cold, cruel, unfriendly GRENINJA? Look at this guy — does this look like the most popular Pokémon to you?

pikachu vote greninja
He’s playing the water card. If Greninja were an electric type, I don’t think he’d get five percent of the vote.
(source)

Granted, Greninja is objectively the most experienced candidate (as the final evolution of Pokemon X/Y starter Froakie, he literally has more XP). But does that make him fit to be the most popular Pokémon? What about Pikachu, the candidate of the people? The face of Pokémon across the world? Let’s be honest here — we all love Pikachu. He is the cutest little electric mouse we’ve ever seen.

pikachu vote cute
Anyone not voting for Pikachu is either corrupt or a dupe.
(source)

There’s no doubt in my mind that Pikachu would be crowned the most popular Pokémon had Greninja actually battled Pikachu more than six times, as compared to the 12 battles on the competing Digimon side, or if those battles hadn’t been scheduled at what are traditionally the lowest-rated time slots on television. And the election results would’ve certainly been different if the head of the Pokémon Company wasn’t noted Pokemon X fan Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.

But even though voting is literally over, the Pikachu campaign hasn’t lost hope. There are still superdelegates out there who can be flipped.

pikachu vote superdelegates
Do what you know is right here, Bowser. DO WHAT YOU KNOW IS RIGHT.
(source)

 

Follow Mikey on Twitter @mikeymccollor.

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