“Wooooohooooo! Summer break! Can’t wait!” WRONG. This may be an unpopular opinion, but summer actually isn’t as great as everyone makes it out to be. Unless you miraculously end up at the summer camp of your dreams, your summer is going to be a sweaty, boring mess of days. It’s like a black hole of life where time stops making sense and everything loses its meaning. Here are a few definitive reasons why summer break is actually the worst:
It’s so hot that you can’t really think straight, and parts of your body are sweating that you didn’t even know could sweat. Depending on where you live, the humidity will make you feel like you’re constantly submerged in a jacuzzi. The only thing you can really do is go to the mall, stay inside, or find a pool. YOUR OPTIONS ARE LIMITED.
You have to wear a bathing suit
Maybe you’re blessed with the body of Adonis, but that rest of us cringe when we think of having to put on a bathing suit. What, we have to put down the Oreos and ice cream just so we don’t gross out other people at the pool?! Uggggggghhh. *continues eating Oreos* Even if you don’t really like swimming, there will be a pool event that comes up during the summer you’ll feel obligated to attend, and it won’t be pretty.
Summer is super exciting for about the first week-and-a-half, and then you realize you don’t have anything to do. Your mom will then give you a list of ideas, but all of them sound boring. “Why don’t you go to the library?” “I’d rather suffocate myself with a book jacket, thanks.” Internet and video games can only be fun for so long. (Who am I kidding. We could all browse the internet twenty-four hours a day and be perfectly content.)
Your friends are out of town
Everybody’s gone. Whether they’re going to vacation, camp, or Maine to spend the summer with their dad, all your friends have flown the coop. In your head, you had visions of your crew causing mischief like they do in those summer comedy movies, but that’s just not how real life plays out.
Sunburns are an inevitable part of summer. You keep slathering on the sunscreen, but you always manage to miss a spot. Not only is it embarrassing to look like a lobster, it’s freaking painful. *shakes fist at the sun* Damn you, giant ball of fire!
Bugs love the summertime. Do I really have to explain to you why bugs are the worst? I hope not.
In theory, family vacations are a blast. In reality, though, you’d rather be with your friends, you keep getting in fights with your siblings, and your parents are super embarrassing. (Why does your dad insist on wearing that Hawaiian t-shirt?!) Sure, you probably seem ungrateful, but all the forced fun really bums you out.
You’re going to get assigned summer reading, and you’re going to wait until the last minute to do it. You’ll stress yourself out and probably not even get it all done. STRESS. IN THE SUMMER. Talk about an oxymoron. Someone needs to fix the education system in our country, amiright?
Eh, who am I kidding, summer is great. I’m just bitter because I’m not in school anymore and don’t get a vacation. Go frolic in the water, get into trouble, and go on some summer adventures!