Some classic children’s books that are adapted into movies turned into box office hits, like Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs, while some are even better than the book, like Where the Wild Things Are. But some kid’s books, god help us, are disasters (I’m looking at you, Cat in the Hat). But these children’s books… these children’s book movies would be, in fact, horrifying.
The Very Hungry Caterpillar
Horrifying Movie Plot: Twenty formaldehyde human torsos attached to a Martian’s head ceaselessly devour everything in sight until they transform into something even larger… and airborne.
Movie Poster Tagline: “Godzilla meets Human Centipede Caterpillar.”
Goodnight, Moon
Horrifying Movie Plot: Small bunny puts off going to bed — and being torn apart by nocturnal predators — by bidding one last farewell to everything in a room designed by a colorblind funeral director.
Movie Poster Tagline: “Sleep will come. And so will they.”
The Monster at the End of This Book
Horrifying Movie Plot: One character spends 90 minutes in sheer terror about a monster’s imminent attack, only to learn that the beast… dwells within.
Movie Poster Tagline: “Fear thyself.”
Hop on Pop
Horrifying Movie Plot: Two small children try to kill their dad for the inheritance by crushing his heart and spine.
Movie Poster Tagline: “Playtime is over.”
The Giving Tree
Horrifying Movie Plot: Tree gives, and gives, and gives to a greedy, thoughtless child. Eventually, that child becomes an adult, and eventually,an old man, mutilating that kind tree beyond all recognition.
Movie Poster Tagline: “Dear Kids: This is what a codependent relationship looks like. You will have several in your lifetime.”
Are You My Mother?
Horrifying Movie Plot: A little bird who believes he was abandoned by his mom learns that no one else will ever want to love or take care of him.
Movie Poster Tagline: “You will always be alone.”
If You Give a Mouse a Cookie
Horrifying Movie Plot: A mouse slowly transforms a happy, helpful boy into its eternal slave.
Movie Poster Tagline: “They were in your walls. Now they’re in your HEAD.”
Everyone Poops
Horrifying Movie Plot: The title doesn’t lie — every person, every creature, every THING keeps on defecating (in IMAX 3D).
Movie Poster Tagline: “It’s inside you… AND IT WANTS OUT.”
Which horrifying children’s movie do you hope never comes to be?
