7 Smartphone Cases and What They Say About You

You know how a picture is worth a thousand words? Well a smartphone case basically sums up your entire existence. Here’s what your choice in case says about you:

Wallet Case

You go clubbing all the time and can’t be bothered to bring a purse. You just need your cellphone and ID. Keys? Psh. You’ll wake your roommate up at 3:00AM. Money? Nah, that greasy promoter is gonna hook you up with drinks and a table. (Extra points if the case is a wristlet.)

Glitter Liquid Case

You do hot yoga. Your Instagram profile says you’re a “Creative Director” (of what we don’t know). You run a blog that hasn’t been updated since March 2014.

Black Leather

You can’t be bothered with whimsical cases. You have deals to make, planes to catch, and have no idea what Snapchat is. Or you’re 89 and your grandchildren insisted you needed a smartphone. You use it to play solitaire and keep it plugged in at all times.

Otterbox

You buy insurance for your glasses, of which you own three identical pairs. You rock a Lex Luthor look because you burned off your eyebrows in a freak birthday candle incident. Somehow you manage to go through four phones a year even with your ugly Otterbox case. You’re proud of this fact.

Bumper

You wear Uggs with shorts. Flip-flops with a parka. You over-pack for everything, and yet you are always asking US for gum. You’re a walking contradiction. A bumper makes no effing sense! Either get a case or don’t, quit playing games with us Sandra!

Battery Case

You like technology. You own an Apple Watch even though your phone is on you 100 percent of the time. You have an iPad even though it’s redundant. You never leave the house so it really makes no sense for you to have this case.

No Case

You live on the edge. You don’t take multivitamins. You don’t go to the dentist bi-yearly. You’re basically Liam Neeson minus the caring about your kidnapped daughter cuz you don’t care about ANYTHING.

Did I nail it or WHAT? Let me know on Twitter @AndiHester.